Day 44: How I live Responsibility

Within this blog I am looking at the word responsibility and how I am living it currently, what definitions, values I have attached to it and in the end to correct my living expression of this word so that it would reflect a new direction that is best for all

REDEFINING THE WORD: Responsibility

  1. Gathering Information
  • establishing self’s allocation point – I always projected this word into the future where I believed it’s something for the grown-ups. Whenever faced with responsibility I would experience anxiety and would be lost within myself not knowing what to do and within that try and direct it towards someone else. Basically I existed in constant avoidance of any type of responsibility until much later where my perception reversed and I saw that by taking/living responsibility I am the one who make decisions and do not exist as mere follower and thus I am free.  Yet I never saw that as a real freedom because responsibility to me also meant commitment to someone or something ,which I perceived as a limitation on my “free soul”
  • dictionary definition

responsibility /rspnsblti/ n. M18. [f. next + -ITY.]

1 A charge, trust, or duty, for which one is responsible; a person for whom or thing for which one is responsible. M18.

2 The state or fact of being responsible; the opportunity or necessity to be responsible. Foll. by for, of. L18.[1]

  • sounding the word – Responsibility

re sponge ability – where on comes into this world an sucks like a sponge all the knowledge and information taking it for granted without questioning it and where one then ensures that this knowledge and information is kept as it is and the rules/agreements based on this knowledge are honored and followed – then one is a responsible being

  1. Investigating the information of the word that has been gathered

Determining whether the definition within the different aspects that I have gathered as information of the word, carry a polarity charge (is it made ‘good’/’positive’ or ‘bad’/’negative’)?

My own personal experience with this word

As a child I was never really introduced to this word because my actions naturally were pretty much aligned with what was required of me to be done so in that sense I was never told that I have any responsibilities. My first encounter with responsibility was when I managed, through much effort, to convince my mother to get me a dog where I promised her that he will be purely my responsibility and there will be no burden on anyone else. After my first day of having a dog I realized what a grave mistake I have made and luckily for me I could give him away to my grandmother’s house and that’s what I did the same or maybe the next day. So that was a negative experience  within which I perceived that by being responsible for someone else, especially such a dependent being, I am losing completely my freedom and there was this fear that I will no longer be able to do the things that I like. It was a burden for me. Since then I avoided situations like that and basically enjoyed my freedom until much later were I was growing older and coming to the point where I had to go out into the system and take care for myself where again I had a big resistance because of the perception that I am losing my freedom to simply be and enjoy myself. Yet I could see that I was becoming a burden to my mother by not taking responsibility for myself.  When I finally moved myself to get out and find myself a job I started noticing that taking responsibility is imperative for being successful within the world system and it became a point I desired because without responsibility I was a mere follower of those who took upon themselves more responsibility. Thus I perceived not having/living responsibility to be a loss of freedom where I am not in control of my experiences. So basically my view of the word has reversed from where I saw that having responsibility was impediment to my freedom to the realization that not having responsibility was a real hindrance to be free.  Still I had lots of resistance to become responsible as per my definition of committing myself to become something within this world system where within that I could never perceive myself being committed and bound to some specific area where I believed I have to give myself away and climb the damned ladder of success. So basically the word responsibility was always negatively charged throughout my life experience.

Self-Forgiveness on the word

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear responsibility within the believe that if I become a responsible being I will lose my freedom and no longer be able to do what I want

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that who I am now is a manifestation that is emerging from the starting point of separation and thus everything I do and say supports separation which means that I cannot do “freely” what I want but instead I have to take self-responsibility in establishing myself within the directive principle of living what’s best for all within realization that I am not separate from anyone or anything else but am one and equal to all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that there is no freedom in pursuing my own happiness and that no happiness is possible until all as one and equal are supported in having fulfilling lives here on earth

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that responsibility can be extended beyond this accepted system where I take responsibility in changing what is here as myself and as this reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that what is here as this system is unchangeable and there is just no way I can make any impact thus there is no point in taking responsibility

3. New definition

Responsibility is to be accountable for every word and deed where no excuse or justification exists. It’s also the commitment to educate myself on all aspects of this existence to thus develop the ability to respond (response ability) to each situation that I face in the most practical common sense way that is in alignment with the principle of what’s best for all.  It’s not to fear responsibility and the possible mistakes but to actually move myself  in self-trust and be willing to really stand up no matter what and take responsibility in bringing a new world that will free all life.

Self-corrective statements in how I practically will walk responsibility

I commit myself to approach responsibility practically where I asses in common sense how much responsibility I am actually able to handle so that I do not go into an idea of myself and what I should be able to do

I commit myself to first start taking responsibility for myself, my thoughts, inner conversations, my immediate environment where within that I prove to myself that I can stand stable  within me and my immediate environment and then from here I can slowly expand taking  more and more responsibility

I commit myself to stop any and all experiences of wanting more than I can handle where within that I first stand in complete clarity within myself and my immediate environment

I commit myself grow and expand from the smallest points that need attention in me and my immediate environment where I make sure that I am satisfied with how I deal with the points in utmost specificity and where its physically proven to be effective

The Process of how to  Redefine Words:

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One comment on “Day 44: How I live Responsibility

  1. […] the Earth’s journey to life blog, to which has come to my awareness through the reading of a destonian’s blog which have applied the practice. The technique essentially consists of the act of redefining […]

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