Day 47: The Horror of Me


Police shoot naked man eating another man’s face in bizarre Miami incident

I had a reaction reading this article and there was like an experience of total separation where I completely refused to stand as equal to this kind of atrocity. Later I have read a blog by Lindsey where one of her forgiveness statements was: I forgive myself that I have NOT accepted and allowed myself to fully consider and realize that every single manifestation of Horror in this world COULD NOT be here, if it wasn’t WITHIN ME FIRST”

So within this I see how much I still have to grasp about what I have become and how I am still locking myself from the reality of myself. Somewhere inside I still want to believe that maybe I am good and benevolent being and that I am not really responsible for EVERYTHING that is happening in this world.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the consequences of this world in separation where I am one and equal part that has allowed this separation to emerge and continue

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to avoid facing myself as all aspects of this existence within the hope that I am able to leap into a new world of equality without facing my current creation

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become fearful of myself when and as I have seen parts of myself instead of realizing that what is done is done and what is here is here and that it is my responsibility to face myself as what I have become in separation from all parts of existence so that possibly some consequences could be prevented

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to choose to remain “safe” in my personal bubble instead of stopping all judgment of this existence and seeing into it directly within realization that in this seeing and my actions afterwards to correct what I see is the only real possibility to create some safety in a form of possibly diminishing the consequences that I and all will have to face for accepting and allowing the world of conflict and abuse

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be surprised and shocked when seeing the extent of abuse in this world when I can clearly see within myself the nature of how I exist – as all my inner conversations, my secret mind, the backchat, thoughts, emotions like anger and rage – where they reflect the same abuse and violence that I see in the world around me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the longer I wait for myself to gather the courage to look and see within myself and what I have become the harder it will get, as more and more layers of self-deception accumulate and consequently create bigger consequence to be faced ahead

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to refuse to see that I am still holding on to my personal bubble existence because it still works for me pretty well and I am not keen on changing myself thus within that I am stating that I don’t care about this world and what is happening to others beings because I am still ok


I commit myself to break my veil of separation and slowly but surely deprogram all my self-defenses that “guard” me from the totality of this existence

I commit myself to investigate my reactions that i have towards people or events in this world within realization that it’s a self-defense mechanism placing me into an experience of stagnation

“Stagnation – STA (Stand) G (God’s) NATION – as long as human beings accepted and allow God, or a God anything more superior/powerful than self in the Mind, that has authority over and of self’s nation – the physical-body, this physical existence, there will be no living, no action, no decision and no movement for and as change, because we’ve enslaved ourselves to our own idea/belief of an externalized superiority/power, when we’re supposed to take, live and be that power in and as our very living to stand for change for self and for all. Imagine, to what lengths people would go for an imaginary idea/belief in their own Minds, but would not do it to fight for the lives of all those suffering on this earth… if people put as much effort into their living as they do in their prayers to bring about change on this earth…we may just be a step towards possibly getting somewhere” – Sunette


Similar Writings:

Day 44: The Evil Veil of Me

Day 43: Careless

Day 47: Giving up “Fighting the Good Fight”


Here Is Some Reading On the Atrocities existent in our world and how to take Responsibility for these manifestations”

Day 41: Shame, Shame, Shame

Day 40: Another Horror Shooting

Day 38: The Price of Ivory

Day 42 – Male Ego and dominance


Main desteni Sites:

Desteni Website

Desteni Forum

Equal Money System

7 Year Journey to Life

7 Year Journey to Life Facebook Page

Creation’s Journey to Life

Heaven’s Journey to Life



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