Cool, turning 50 today. I’ll get another star from wordpress. It actually gives a little reward on every 5th blog – like 5, 10, 15… but what is interesting is that when I get this reward I have a subtle feeling of satisfaction inside of me. But who doesn’t like getting rewards, gifts, compliments, or being flattered, appreciated, praised or even worshiped in some way. Right?
It appears we as humans have been conditioned since early childhood to be reward seeking creatures, carefully calculating our actions and constantly mulling within ourselves the question – what’s in it for me?
The point here is to stop seeking and actually finding – life here. There is no need to seek for anything, it’s impossible to get anything that would make us more than we already are as life here. The only relevant question is: what is not allowing us to realize ourselves as who we really are as life as the dust of the earth where we are all one and equal, not really divided, not separate but complete yet unfortunately also sadly oblivious and lost
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a perfect robot within this system who reacts predictably to reward based mechanism of manipulation
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as thoughts/feelings/emotions which are all energetic experiences and thus within this believe that I need this energy to be alive I become that very energy and thus I move as this energy in predictable patterns within polarity equations where in this way I give my permission to be manipulated by those who understand how energy is moving and how they can use this knowledge to serve their own greed – where I am just a puppet falling into the trap through my allowance
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within that believe that I am energy and I need energy to survive I keep seeking for more and more energy thus becoming a perfect consumer within this system
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize that throughout years participating within this system of believe that I need energy to live and thrive I was actually only diminishing myself as who I am as my physical body where I went into further separation into my mind, constantly and continually fueling it with energy and searching for something more within external experiences while the physical reality was ignored and made less than the mind
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become addicted to energy to the extent that if there is no energetic reward for me I will not move
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to realize that everything I have done throughout my life was based on energy, all my relationships were calculated affairs to make sure I get what I need: whether it was money, praise, appreciation, confirmation, love or any other form of good feeling
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to never see the fuckupness and never question this way of life which is so completely based on constant lack where endless search is instigated by each in search of something more – we are never good enough, we always need more
I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to ever pose questions to myself like: at what price am I getting my positive experiences fulfilled? Is energy distributed equally to all and why not? Am I also contributing to inequality by being a silent participant?
I commit myself to expose and show the effects of the system that is based on movement only with energetic reward based mechanism where there is no other principle guiding our actions
I commit myself to show that the only valid principle that can stand the test of time and sort out the problems we face today is the principle of oneness and equality which means that within our actions we must consider everything and everyone in the same way that we would like to be considered
I commit myself to keep investigating all my actions to see where I am still moving based on energy where I correct my behavior to only move according to principle of life
I commit myself to become the master of myself and no longer allow myself to be moved by energy and manipulation of those who have the knowledge how energy is moving and how they can use it for their own advantage – like all the corporations playing with love and other good feelings to sell their products
I commit myself to show that one cannot find self-fulfillment outside of self by buying more stuff or accumulating more energetic experiences – the only way is the way back – to return to the simplicity of the child and be equal to what is here as the physical reality as life itself