Day 63: I can’t Hear when I am not Here

I have just read a very cool blog “Day 34 – Breath is the Secret to Listening”. I could very much relate to this point because I am still facing that extensively in my reality where I have this issue, quite literally, of not being able to hear what others are saying. This limitation significantly impedes my participation in every day interactions where I have to keep asking people to repeat what they said two or three times before I can understand their words. I noticed this first by watching movies where many times I have to rewind the scenes to understand the words. And I don’t have any hearing problems, meaning a disability to hear words loud, no, it’s just that I don’t get the clarity and can’t distinguish the words clearly. So it’s been quite a problem for many years now, yet as a “solution” what I learned to do when communicating with different people is that I just nod my head and say yes when I do not understand what another is saying so that I can move on to the next moment where hopefully I will get it this time. So within this I have said YES many many times to the things I have no clue about. I also get into many uncomfortable situations where sometimes after nodding on the occasional statement which I haven’t understood a person continues within the same lines where now I have to pretend and look for a way out of the situation. So basically it’s a very shitty experience and I mean I have seen the stupidity of this kind of communication and tried to listen more carefully and just ask for people to repeat whenever I do not understand something, yet still it’s here and still this point creates a lot of self-judgment within.

I was even born with bigger ears than what is considered a usual size standard of human ears and yet my locators fail to catch properly the signals coming out from others. Now when I look at the point and specifically at the word HEAR it is very similar to the word HERE. So from what I see looking back at my interactions with people where I was unable to hear them I can see that within all these moments I wasn’t really HERE, I was usually somewhere out THERE in my mind, floating in my thoughts whether contemplating some issue, or fantasizing, daydreaming, or doing something else, but I wasn’t here fully with my presence. So it makes sense that the first time when somebody tells me something that initially serves only as a wakeup call where I stop my mind activity and only now I am ready to receive the message, thus I have to ask to repeat what was said. Here then I try to listen really hard what another is saying were I put all my tension trying to focus on the clarity of words spoken where again many times I miss the whole context of the message.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate extensively in my thoughts where I separate myself from my physical immediate environment thus becoming like a living zombie existing in the alternate reality of the mind

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my mind reality is in any way more important that being here with my body in my immediate environment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to try and become more aware of my environment by trying to understand it through my mind not realizing that my mind gives me only one dimensional view where I miss the whole picture

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that existing in my mind I keep interpreting and viewing things I my own way which is very limited thus when somebody speaks something that does not closely resemble my own thoughts I am unable to quickly grasp the message and need time to adjust to the information

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to utilize breathing as a tool to remain here in my physical environment not allowing myself to drift away into my thoughts

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that any thinking process can exist only in polarity as energetic experience where I am sorting and categorizing all the information to create certain outcomes – Within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the only outcome I am in search for is positive experiences where I am  always trying to win, be better, be more – thus all that I am doing in the mind and thinking is I am boosting my ego and separating myself further and further from HERE as my immediate physical space

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not existing in and as my thoughts because of the perception that this is my “safe haven” while in reality it’s only the cage where I keep myself as a slave

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become so used to my thinking process that I don’t even question my thoughts and the decisions I make based on these thoughts

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fully trust my thoughts because it is the only way I ever knew how to exist thus stopping my thoughts seems like dying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that who I am as the limited existence of the mind based on separation, greed and self-interest has to stop so that silence could be born where I as life can emerge and become the living body in service of life

I commit myself to remind myself as many times as I possibly can throughout the day to remain here in and as my breathing so that my thoughts would loosen the grip that it currently has on me

I commit myself to practice listening to people, audio interviews etc. with a clear mind where I do not allow the mind to use the information for the purposes of boosting its existence

For more specific information regarding this point please listen to this amazing interview

What is the consequence of interpreting existence within only One Dimension of the Mind? How has existence been interpreted within only One Dimension of the Mind? What or Who has been missed within this existence with existing within only One Dimension of the Mind? Why can’t Human-Beings Hear/See Equality and Oneness? What is the relationship between Hearing and being Here? What does it mean to be Here Hearing? Why is Breath the answer to Life? What is Breath really within the context of our multi-dimensional processes within the Mind and the Physical of Existence? All these questions and more are answered within this Interview.

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