Day 85: Failure Character – continued

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a failure character through my perception of how this world exists where I saw that to be successful in this world as being the opposite of failure means to become limited and also abusive

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that by becoming a failure in this reality I will be able to extract myself from this system and walk out of this matrix into other realms of existence without realizing that there is nowhere to go as this is the only place there is and I have to deal with it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to place my trust in the knowledge that I have accumulated by reading books about the great masters who were apparently able to walk out of this world at will where it was said that you have to become nothing in order to do that and thus I made myself to be nothing as complete failure in this system not realizing that through this I have given all my power away to the systems that are in control of this world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that most of the knowledge within this reality was/is specifically designed as a trap to distract people from the actual matters in this world where the elite can remain in their positions of power without being challenged

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the systems of control within this reality where I created a believe that I must run away from these systems in order to free myself where within that I adopted a saying “the crooked tree is of no use to the woodsmen” as it made a complete sense to me as a way to escape from this reality – so I became the crooked tree (a failure) within my world thus “escaping” the woodsmen (the systems of control) not realizing that I fell into the trap of complete abdication of my power and responsibility as a participant in this reality thus giving my permission for the systems of control to continue the destruction of this reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that within knowledge where it was stated that one has to become “nothing” it was also indicated that in this way you become everything and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have never released my desire to become successful and powerful within this reality which led me to follow this knowledge in the first place

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have trapped myself into the failure character through absolute greed for power and control

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself completely into an alternate reality where I was existing in hope to achieve the promised existence while in the actual reality I was degrading myself more and more through the acceptance of the failure character as being the one who will lead me into the promised existence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the nature of this existence where it is divided into polarities of rich and poor, good and bad, failure and success – and thus for the powerful/successful to exist there must be those who fail – and within that those who are in control and are willing to remain there have designed traps, like various religions and spiritualties, where people are fed with hopes of a better life somewhere out there while the real life here in the physical is neglected and dismissed as not being important, to the great satisfaction of those in control

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to viciously defend my failure character despite any attempts by those close to me to show what I was doing and who I have become

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that whatever I was doing and whatever knowledge I was following in my attempts to escape this reality I still remained here in this physical world having to take care for my basic needs where I have not realized that for me to be able to fulfill my basic needs somebody had to work and produce all these necessities needed to sustain me – thus I was only existing as a leach in this world feeding of it just to sustain the creation of my alternate realities in my mind where I never asked myself the question how can I contribute to this world to become make it a better place for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to justify my alternate reality creations by believing that when I find the way to escape from this limited system I will teach others to do the same, to follow me, which again shows my desire for power and need to be followed and admired by others

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I was actually afraid of the current systems that were in control of this world where within that I saw them as too big to be challenged thus choosing an easy way out that was placed before me – to become nothing/failure and get my ticket out, beyond and above the current system

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize the preprogrammed nature of my existence where all the events, as coincidences, were directing me towards a certain outcome – where again there was a clever explanation for that – it’s the higher me showing the little me the way to freedom– while in fact I was left to remain in the failure character in hope that I will reach something more

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that the whole outside reality as all the systems that exist here are all me as direct reflections of how I exist within myself and thus my attempts to run away from here only has been dividing me inside myself into different parts which were fighting between each other and creating the energy that is necessary for this whole system to function – so the whole time I was perpetuating my own enslavement inside and outside

To be continued

Advertisements

One comment on “Day 85: Failure Character – continued

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s