Day 92: “I give up” character – continued

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create “I give up character” as a safety valve that “protects” me from facing any type of conflict within my reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe in my goodness and innocence and thus utilizing “I give up character” I keep running away from all the perceived badness that I face within and without never realizing that I am running away, denying, and resisting myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from the evil part of myself and within this separation create “I give up character” to further hide within the perception that I am a benevolent being

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not investigate my thoughts and backchat that comes up whenever I am faced with a conflict situation in my world but instead fall back into my “I give up” character where I justify my righteousness and move away from the situation/environment just to not face myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that when I justify my innocence within all conflict situations I am not taking into account all the dimensions of the event but only filter the situation through my limited perception as a character so that I could come out as a winner

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to be self-honest with myself in admitting my faults and finding within that a way to correct myself until I can stand stable and see all the dimensions within all situations

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I exist in judgment towards the evil within and without and thus I am not able to communicate openly about it and direct it as myself towards a solution that would benefit all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take things personally where I create energetic reactions as feelings and emotions and within that I do not see situations as they really are where within that I chose the easy way out as “I give up” character where I can simply flee the whole scene and within that I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that I have to face myself or I will keep making time loops as I have always done where I keep arriving at the exact same point over and over again

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enjoy playing a victim within conflict situations where during this experience I shut down my mind and go into the back of my body taking myself to the point into the solar plexus where I can experience a form of stability just waiting for the events to pass so that I could later step into “I give up” character and say goodbye to those whom I blame for the situation again missing the point of self-responsibility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that within all of that I am simply manipulating myself creating excuses, reasons and justifications to not face myself directly

 

I commit myself to realize that giving up on myself is not an option because I will face myself either way in this life or the afterlife and thus I commit myself to gently push myself to develop the strength within myself to face what I have become

I commit myself stop separating myself into characters of my choice where I make sure that I do not face the evil parts of myself and thus I commit myself to realize that whatever I face in this world is me and thus i have to stand equal to all parts of myself and direct it towards a solution that is best for all

I commit myself to self-honestly investigate my thoughts and backchat whenever I am faced with a conflict situation where I will see that I am actually the creator and equal participant within all events

I commit myself to stop playing the game of winners and loser where within all conflict situation I try to come out as a winner, looking for clues and reasons to support my righteousness so I commit myself to see and realize that I am always a loser when I separate myself from what is here as the totality of myself

I commit myself to take time and self-honestly investigate the conflict situations that i participate  so that I would understand all the dimensions of the event and thus be able to come with a solution that is best for all

I commit myself stop all judgment towards the evil within me where I no longer take things personally but realize that the only way to change and correct myself is if I see myself in absolute clarity where no thought, emotions or feeling exists

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