Day 216: Shifting the Starting Point of Writing

It’s really difficult to write something using only knowledge that is not coming directly from self but is just blindly learned information that’s been stored in the memory banks of the mind. It’s interesting to observe my mind when and as I decide to do some writing on some point that I cannot really see within myself but purely feel the obligation to write about. Here I can find only pieces of information which are absolutely unreliable, where in that I can never be sure whether some data hasn’t already been manipulated to better fir my story, the story that I have preplanned in my mind, where the preplanning is essentially done in and as the starting point of doing the writing in the first place:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to write from the starting point of guilt where I am being pushed by energetic emotional charge instead of me pushing myself in and as breath to write myself out within realizing that this is the opportunity of developing intimacy (into –me-I –see) with myself where I can get to know myself better

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in separation in and as my own mind having lost all touch with the bigger reality that I have abandoned for reasons of self-interest

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear my own judgment when and as I come off the track of who I believe I am and start expressing myself as I never have before

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to explore myself in my writings but only keep and sustain the limited “safe” version of myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that by suppressing my expression I am developing mental and physical disease within me in various forms that will have to manifest to show me through the symptoms what I am doing instead of me getting ahead of the process and applying the solution of prevention through immediate correction

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how throughout my life by judging the expression of others I was judging myself and as a consequence I have sentenced myself to exist in limitation

I commit myself to search and experiment with new ways of expression and in this find the enjoyment to live and so become more effective in creating a world where all can do the same because I begin to realize that we ARE the SAME in fact as who we are as the flesh of this earth and we all deserve equal opportunities to enjoy this life

I commit myself to become aware in my everyday living where I learn to assess the starting point of each action I take thus ensuring that I no longer live for the sake of my mind’s ideas, beliefs and perceptions but I live for myself as who I am as the physical body in cooperation with all other physical bodies

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