Day 239: Inappropriate Laughter: Escape Mechanism

Yes there is a lot of that going on. Just consider the situation: somebody tells you an experience that is really bothering them and they really feel bad about it, yet you in that moment just start to laugh as in that moment it seem like such a stupid thing to feel bad about, like the situation seems so irrelevant and thus funny for YOU. Yes for You but not for another, so the question – have we considered another or just look at things from our own perspective?

Ok so I have gotten myself in many such situations, being as the one that laughed at another – somewhere along the way in my life experience I created this believe or a strategy of laughter as means to diminish the situation and hopefully in this way get another to perceive it as unimportant and even make another laugh about it. Yes that worked a couple of times, but in many instances I really failed to consider the totality of the situation, the person and everything else that was involved. I mean there are situations that get to a point that require making tough decision, planning the practical steps etc, yet the smart ass that is me just used the laughter as the ultimate problem solving technique instead of standing as an equal and working together towards the solution.

Another reason why I used laughter here was because I couldn’t really see any solution, I couldn’t relate to another, place myself in their shoes – basically standing in absolute separation from everything that is happening and not actually wanting to get involved – “I mean don’t want to be dragged by another into their negativity”, “I don’t want that, i am good where I am”. So this is absolute failure to live the Jesus’s message of “do unto another you want them to do unto you”. I mean how many times I found myself in trouble asking for some assistance and how in these moments I truly wished that people would relate to my problems and would assist me and how grateful I was when somebody would stop from what they were doing and listen and hear what I had to say and in this then respond with clear directions to guide me away from the momentary confusion I was experiencing.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to laugh at another’s problems within the believe that this is a solution

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize how by using laughter I was avoiding to stop for a moment and consider another in totality and truly hear and assist with whatever was needed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to do unto others what I wouldn’t which they would do unto me – like somebody laughing at me when I would share my problems and seek some direction on how to solve them

I forgive myself that I haven’t accepted and allowed myself to go out of my way to listen and hear to another’s story of need and in this stand in equality with another and find the best solution

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that laughter was the cure for all illnesses while I was using it merely as an escape tool

Thus I commit myself to slow myself down when and as someone is sharing with me their problems and in this consider all the dimensions of the problem, place myself for a moment in their shoes and see as myself what I would do if I were in that situation and in this share my insight and just work together on a solution

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2 comments on “Day 239: Inappropriate Laughter: Escape Mechanism

  1. Very cool self honesty and support here Arvydas – thanks for this! I direct myself to change myself when I find myself in such moments of not living the Jesus’ message of “do unto another you want them to do unto you” .

  2. karinamartinkute says:

    I know that laughter 🙂 but it wasn’t that bad 🙂

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