Day 261: Resistance to do the Real Investigation

Today reading and doing some research I see how I am allowing myself to get into things superficially without going deeper to find the real underlying information that is the actual design of everything. That is mostly due to a busy mind that keeps jumping from point A to point B in a racy manner. I liked the Osho when he explained once that instead going from A to B we should try and go A; A1; A2… so it’s like taking the point and understanding it for real into the depth of it until we get to another point.

So when the mind gets out of control and won’t stop racing i found for myself that it’s cool to start observing it at night when lying down for a night’s sleep, when I close my eyes I do the assessment of what is happening within me. Sometimes it’s like a 100 movies playing at once, too overwhelming and one can feel hopeless in attempting to stop the show, yet the key is to realize that these thoughts are not me, I am the awareness observing these thoughts and thoughts have the power only through my allowance and acceptance of them as myself. Breathing and remaining here with the physical touch is amazingly supportive in these moments where eventually the thoughts start to quiet down and some silence descends. Yes it feels like descending, coming back to earth from endless imaginative, opinionated dimensions of consciousness

So the point is bringing Self back Here in each moment to face reality as it is, without interpretation and the system of filtering where our filters are the knowledge and information passed to us from our parents and programmed further by our mentors. I mean I see it on myself, all that stuff I have learned throughout my life is just a baggage which hinders me, makes me absolutely ineffective to deal with my life. The older I grew the more stuff I was learning and the further away I felt I am going from that which matters. Nowhere in the education system or at home or anywhere else I was taught how to deal effectively with the challenges I faced later in life. I was taught only the theory of life which is presented as somebody wants it to be but not what exists practically for real. Nobody wants to talk about the underlying factors that truly control this existence, I mean all the nasty stuff that is here in the minds, the thoughts of each human being which DO direct the decisions and events. So that, kind of, explains the “natural” resistance that appears when starting to go deeper and doing the real, practical research on how this world and how my mind in relation to the world really works.

The natural tendency is just to accept the existing data without questioning it, like I was taught in school, where any paper should only be a collection of already existing sources and preferably the ones that are accepted as truth by the public authority. Critical thinking somehow didn’t have space in it all, a child is never considered of, maybe, having his own ability to see the common sense and contribute as equal to the process of education.

So it’s like you are born whole into this world and then slowly but surely through all these processes you are diminished and molded into some limited personality completely dependent on all the information that you have been exposed to and programmed as. I mean One of the first things I was told when I started to understand people around me was that I was born in sin and now I am a lesser being and this was the foundation upon which I was building my life. So from the very beginning I was denied the opportunity to stand as equal to everything else here.

The saddest part is that all of this is allowed to continue and nobody seems to noticed the consequences that are already in our face. I mean just today I have been invited to attend another baptizing event within my family to which I had to politely say NO by stating that I do not allow the repetition of the same mistakes that was done unto me. I do not support the old ways that are proved to be ineffective and absolutely destructive to all life. How about investigating, slowing down the mind and doing the damn research A; A1; A2… and so understanding what are we actually accepting and allowing within each point of our living and what the consequences of this are.

A Prayer for Humanity



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