Day 297: Slowing Down to Avoid Stress

time-spiral-400x315Through experience I have noticed that many people when we watch TV or read magazines or simply observe other people from our environment, who are successful and are doing many great things, we tend to go into a comparison and in this a normal reaction is to feel a little bit bad about ourselves. We experience some jealousy and/or self-judgment because it’s not us that came up with some specific idea, it’s not us that has the skill, has the knowledge and it’s not us that lives this apparently better life.

What I found within myself when facing such moments is to immediately try to imagine myself in their position, I try to see what skills can I develop, how can I build myself up, basically how can I evolve to that or similar state of being. Facing such situations few times a day or however frequently and not dealing with it properly, meaning, not investigating within myself whether that specific point is actually relevant in my process, I mean do I actually need such skills like the individual, I observed or heard about, has. Also I am not investigating the actual process that would need to be walked to get to such a position etc. I mean there are many dimensions that need to be taken into consideration within each such point. So when not dealing with such experiences I found that I am accumulating lots of energy through those short moments of jealousy, self-judgment, and overall sense of inferiority.

This energy I have seen does not go anywhere and sits constantly within my body and affects rather greatly everything I do, who I am. There is like this energetic veil that gets pulled over the eyes and there seems to be no way out, and from here, like a headless chicken I run into many directions trying to find a solution. To take an analogy it would be like a plumbing system where in one place there is a blockage of garbage and now the water cannot run through it, it is still seeping ever so slightly, and gives me the idea that it’s still working. And yes, I mean I am still relatively functioning in my reality and I am moving myself here and there but to say that I am actually moving towards my potential, that I am taking the best steps to fulfill my goals, I cannot.

Now the problem comes when the solution is applied through our learned intelligence. Instead of finding and removing the blockage what do we do, using again the analogy, we pour more water to put more pressure and hope that this will blow things the right way. That does work from time to time and only temporarily but it’s definitely not a real solution as the source was never fixed or even understood in its functioning to thus be able to prevent further such instances. We can see the same intelligence applied in most parts of our system – like medical system where instead of understanding the cause of a disease and healing the whole organism we simply suppress the symptoms creating thus deeper problems that manifest now in other ways; also money system where instead of realizing that the system itself is based on the abusive mechanisms that are depleting and exploiting life on earth we continue to fuel it by printing more money or even attempting, as we see currently within the news, to create new global currency believing this to be a solution. Won’t work.

Now going back to the initial point I was addressing what I have seen to be a more effective solution is basically to slow down for a moment and see what is really going on here. Yes, the tendency is to move quickly, there is like a sense of emergency that is growing, the energy is building up and pressure is rising, and we shout that we need a fast solution. Now it’s the best time to apply self-will and to slow down. Writing here is one of the best tools for that because through writing you re-align yourself with the physical time as you type and you look inside yourself – its equal -whereas when you are just in your mind the time is a quantum time and you leap from one thought construct to another in the speed of light, mostly without any understanding or awareness. With writing your mind is basically forced to slow down and you can see better how stuff inside you is moving. Now I can see what is causing my slightly dysfunctional behavior, I can see that I am sitting here with all the energy that I have accumulated through all those moments I have missed and allowed myself to judge myself for who I am and who I am not. I have allowed myself judge myself for the mistakes I have made in the past, and I have also allowed myself to fear and worry about my future. I mean there are many points working at once and unless we slow down we will not be able to identify them and remove them effectively like a real plumber would remove the dirt from the pipes.

“Understanding that each moment is here for self-realization – this being as possible as each breath that you take.”

“Work as self, understanding that there are no mistakes, therefore no judgment for anything you have created – just unconditional release. Silence the mind as you breathe by not accepting fear, confusion or a systematic approach. Approach each situation with a new look at oneness and equality, understanding that in truth there are no limitations, other then what you as the mind allow. Trusting self and trusting that there are no mistakes other than what you have attached blame and judgment to. Allow each moment to be new and ask of yourself forgiveness whenever you realize that the decisions you made were not in truth or were of a system.” – Desteni

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Day 250: Intelligence Character

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So I have just become aware of a point that has always been here but never entered my radar for actual investigation. Somehow I shunned the experience as the thoughts, imaginations, fantasies, hopes around this point away as not relevant. It’s strange to suddenly see and realize that something that I have been participating in and as for so long, which became almost unquestionable part of me, is actually an obstruction, a splinter in my mind that is not allowing me to move effectively in my process.

That point is the great desire to acquire intelligence. Now when I am observing this point in my mind various memories open up to show me how much I was actually seeking to become an intelligent being and so become able to demonstrate this intelligence in my reality gaining thus the value within self-perception. It seems now that every moment that I spent in the mind I was inflicted with this desire and only moments where I was actually remaining here in and as my breath I was able to, for a moment, let go of this desire and even laugh at myself and the struggle that I am putting myself through. It was always a refreshing experience but never a lasting one because as soon as I would give way for the mind to take over and direct my life it would again do the same what it always did, what I, without real awareness, programmed it to do.

Now the questions I am asking myself is what it is exactly that I was seeking? What is this intelligence to me? What forms does it take? In what contexts I was mostly desiring it? How did I want to utilize this intelligence? Essentially the question is what was my starting point in wanting and desiring to become an intelligent being?

Now the dictionary definition says that intelligence is: the ability to comprehend, to understand and profit from experience

That is pretty accurate definition of how I was living this word and especially the word profit is relevant as it shows the self-interest as foundational goal in utilizing intelligence. So whenever the first two conditions would be achieved – the comprehension and understanding of something, the profit part would also follow. In any case that took some form of Ego boost as apparently I was becoming MORE within this newly acquired understanding.

To be continued…

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